Are You Paying to Store This Stuff Too?

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[00:00:00] Are you paying to store this stuff, too? Welcome to Tools to Create a Better Life with myself, Glenyce Hughes. Thank you so much for being here. I am so incredibly grateful for you. 

 

[00:00:13] As many of you know, we are selling everything—almost—and heading off to house and pet sit around the world. We are so excited…. and also terrified…. and also excited… and all the things. 

 

[00:00:29] There’s been a question that I’ve been asking myself as I go through things that actually really inspired something totally different. The question I’ve been asking — because what we’re doing is anything we would like to keep, we’re storing. As I go through things, I’m asking myself: Would I want to pay to store this?

 

Because literally, that’s what we would be doing. If I wanted to, say, keep this coffee cup, then if I do, then I just ask myself, “Am I willing to pay to store it?” It’s an easy question. Not always an easy awareness of whether I am or not, but really doing a good job of really paring down a lot of stuff.

 

[00:01:19] The awareness that I had with this was that’s a question we could actually be asking about the past – with events, with situations, with upsets, with friends or family or work situations, all that stuff. 

 

[00:01:39] Let’s say you had a fight with a friend a couple months ago. Are you willing to pay to store that? Meaning you are going to pay in some way, either you’re going to pay with stress or upset or drama-trauma in your life or whatever. You’re gonna pay somehow, so are you willing to pay to store it? Uh… no. 

 

[00:02:08] I’m gonna say that’s the easy part. The hard part might be, okay, what’s required? It might mean that you go, “Actually, this friendship is really important to me, so I’m going to apologize to them.” It could be that. 

 

I mean, it could be a million things, but if we start looking at the things that we’re storing—I don’t mean just physical things, although those are probably good to look at, too.

 

[00:02:32] I can say this from my high horse cause I’ve been doing this now for what feels like months. I’m not sure I’ve actually been doing it that long. But I did do a good clean-out a few months ago in preparation for listing the acreage and such. 

 

[00:02:48] And so, you know, physical stuff. Even if you’re not paying for a storage container like we are, you are also paying to store it. Again, I don’t mean everything, you should have nothing. That’s not what I mean at all. It’s really looking at if you don’t like that thing

. 

[00:03:08] There’s been a lot of things that I’ve come across that I think, “What the heck? Why do I even still have this?” I’ve been paying to store it just by having it, just by hanging onto it with whatever I’ve attached to it.

[00:03:23] A lot of the stuff that I’ve really had to get present with myself about is stuff that has been given to me from other people. Yeah. There’s the value in it for me. 

 

[00:03:37] You know, my husband gave this to me, and even he said a couple things with some of the things that I’m getting rid of like, “Wow, you’re getting rid of that gift I gave you?” Yes! 

 

Finally, I actually had to say to him like, “You’ve gotta stop that. One, we’ve been together 30 years. You’ve given me a lot of gifts.” I’ve got a lot of amazing stuff like this necklace. It’s something that I would not, actually. I’m happy to pay to store it. It’s gonna travel with me, but I would if it wasn’t going to. I would be happy to pay to store it because I love it. 

 

[00:04:14] But there’s been other things that just are different. They’re just different. A lot of ornaments and different things like that, and I’m keeping a lot, too. There are a lot of things. It’s just been this dance of really getting present with myself. 

 

[00:04:31] The other question with those sorts of things – kind of a little bit off of what I was talking about. But if you are ever in that struggle, if somebody has been maybe gifting you something and you are wondering if you would like to keep it is I actually looked at if this person didn’t buy this for me, would I keep it? 

 

Yeah. A lot of the stuff was a “no.” It doesn’t mean I have to just give it away or throw it away or sell it. I could also look at other possibilities with that. 

 

[00:05:02] Some of them, I did actually go back to the person who purchased it for me. I just asked them, “Hey, I love this so much. I don’t wanna store it. Would you like to have it? Would you like to keep it? Would you like to display it? ” or whatever it was. 

 

[00:05:18] A lot of the people said ‘yes.’ They were happy to have it back. They purchased it for me as a gift and they enjoyed it, and they liked it, so yes. Some people said, “Oh, no. Absolutely not. Just get rid of it.” [It’s] the vulnerability with that, the willingness to tell people, “Hey, I’m not keeping this.” 

 

[00:05:40] Of course in those situations, we do have to look at whatever their response is their response. If you actually know that they would be very upset, you probably don’t need to tell them. You probably don’t need to ask if they would like it back. If they would take that as really unkind or mean of you, then don’t do it. 

 

But otherwise, for the most part, look in your own life. If you’ve given some people gifts, if they asked you if you wanted to keep them if they were no longer gonna have a house or something, how would you be with that?

 

[00:06:13] I was actually surprised at the response. I didn’t do it with a hundred different people or anything, just a few different people that I just knew. I knew they would be okay with me asking, and I knew I would be okay with their response. I don’t need people to keep the stuff they gave me either.

 

[00:06:28] Kind of going back to what I was talking about before, uh, really looking at the emotional stuff that you’re hanging onto, are you willing to pay to store that? 

 

Our bodies will… I shouldn’t say our bodies. I know for me, my body will hold on to stress, and so if I’M willing to let that stuff go in whatever way.

 

Sometimes, it’s really looking at the situation and getting present with it and being honest with myself about maybe what actually went on, not the story that I’ve told myself. 

 

[00:07:03] Even the other day, we had applied for a house sit. The way that the house sitting works is you actually apply. People put their listing on the site and then people apply. We’ll put the link to the site above or below if you wanna check it out. 

 

[00:07:17] And so when we apply, usually there’s a conversation, and then usually there’s a Zoom chat just to get to know each other a little bit on Zoom, and then they make their choice. 

 

Every once in a while, this is actually the only second time this has ever occurred, the person—and they did actually ask a question, so there was a very short conversation. 

 

They just asked one question, and then we just got an email saying, “You’ve been declined. I started doing the ‘taking it personal’ thing, and I was like, “This is ridiculous.” 

 

[00:07:55] We didn’t get chose doesn’t mean anything except we didn’t get chose. I’ll be honest, I really, really wanted that sit, mostly because it had a beautiful swimming pool, of course, and all the things. And it wasn’t personal. 

 

[00:08:13] It was interesting because a couple days before, I’d been listening to a podcast and the person was talking about in their business, they’d started receiving some hate and such. 

 

What the person said was, “I have the emotional intelligence not to take it personal.” I remember I was driving and I looked over, like, I stared at my radio like, What? Emotional intelligence? I’d never considered that before. 

 

[00:08:38] When I was taking it personal, I’m like, “Is this where I’d like to be? Is this my level of emotional intelligence?” I was like, no. 

 

[00:08:46] And it’s not personal. I could have held onto that. I could have stored that. I could have paid to store that sort of stress in my body, and in my being, and in my living, and everything instead of going, “Wow, okay. They didn’t choose us. I wonder what else is out there that is gonna be even yummier.” 

 

[00:09:05] I wonder. I wonder what what else is possible that I’ve never even considered, which is one of my favorite questions to ask because it goes beyond what I’ve actually considered. Imagine that. What else is possible that I’ve never even considered?

 

And then, I started putting my creative energy into creating that rather than this space of, “What did we do wrong? I shouldn’t have said this, and I should like…” oh my gosh. That’s a very, very expensive way to store things. 

 

[00:09:39] Anyway, I just wanted to share this because I think it’s just really cool to consider that we’re paying to store everything. Everything that isn’t yummy and expansive and contributing to us in a way that really generates our life and our living, we’re paying to store that, whether it’s physical stuff or mental or emotional stuff. 

 

And I wonder… I just wonder what it would be like to stop. I wonder what it would be like to cancel those storage fees and do whatever. 

 

[00:10:17] Again, I’m not saying we can just go, “Oh, okay. We had a fight. It’s over. I’m fine.” I don’t mean we’d be a doormat. I don’t mean we just take it. I just wonder if there’s ways that we can let go of things and we can shift things. 

 

It might be, again, like I said earlier, it might be about apologizing. It might be some action on our part. There’s lots of different things with it. 

 

[00:10:39] I just wonder… I just truly, truly wonder if we allowed that to shift if we were emotionally intelligent. I say that with a smile because I don’t even honestly know really what that means, but there was an energy to it when he said it that really made me look at the amount of times where I hadn’t been willing to look at, say, taking it personal as being a choice. That’s really what that invited me to. 

 

[00:11:09] I can choose to be the person who takes it personal and pays to store all that insanity, or I could be the person who chooses to recognize that there’s always something better. Even when it doesn’t turn out the way we would like it to, there’s always something better.

[00:11:28] So, have a great week, sweet friends. I look forward to chatting again next week.

 

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